Dear diary,
My shift today began like any other. I came into the library, said hi whoever was on desk (Goldie), and grabbed the keycard to get into the staffroom. Once there I walked past Boudecia's desk, produced some scraps of food for the caged owl that lives on her desk and filled out my timesheet. The owl was really jittery but I didn't think anything of it at the time.
As I exited the staffroom I noticed some books lying on the floor in Teenage. Trolleyless, I scooped them up in my arms. Then they jumped out. They lay on the floor, spine up, with a cryptic message:
T SYS, T EMS, T IME, T OBE, T RAY
I had to read it four times out loud before it made any sense. "Nice try, but you don't scare me," I proclaimed out loud. A guy sitting in a nearby beanbag stared at me before getting up and moving away. The beanbag started shifting, and three books spewed out of one of the folds.
T RUS, T MES, T UPD
Honestly, I thought the poltergeist was just joking, as ethereal spirits are wont to do, so I ignored the messages and walked back to the desk to get my trolley. Goldie was calling out goodbye to someone who'd just gone out the door. Then, a zzzZAPppp sound. We both looked at each other, then slowly turned our heads towards the check-out computer. Sparks were, well, sparking from it. The loudspeaker, which s normally reserved for telling people the library is closing, crackled out the following message monotonously:
THIS LIBRARY WILL SELF-DESTRUCT IN TEN SECONDS.
Without wasting a moment I ran forward and vaulted over the counter. I dropped to my knees and ducked underneath to pull out the plug. Goldie threw me her glove - she says she wears them because you never know where patrons' hands have been - and I donned it for the task ahead. I grabbed a picture book someone had been wanting to borrow, curled it into a stick-shape and bashed at the socket until the plug came out.
That was only the beginning. All the other computers displayed the same screen: THE SYSTEM HAS GONE DOWN. The public access terminals all went blank. The man Ernesto had been serving at the desk swore and slapped the side of the computer, only to receive a static shock that sent him flyng backwards. A woman on the catalogue terminal squealed and ran at the glass window in terror. It shattered on impact, glass shards cascading on the footpath and around her. The system was down - the panic was global.
Suddenly the nearest Large Print shelf began to tilt menacingly over a frightened woman cowering in a comfy armchair besdie it. Just before it came down on her, Ernesto ran heroically and pulled her chair to safety before the shelf collapsed on top of the armchair. Goldie screamed and began rummaging through a draw. A ceiling light flickered on and off before crashing to the ground. The display cabinet doors swung open wildly, smacking nearby victims. Books were shooting off shelves and aiming for anyone.
Goldie emerged triumphant with a whistle in her hand. She blew as hard as she could. The noise was deafening. As the pandemonium paused momentarily she called for everyone to follow her in an orderly fashion. A rogue thesaurus spung off the reference trolley and flew at her, trying to silence the flagbearer. I leapt in the way and thne, for the second time in my short career, the world went black.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Monday, November 26, 2007
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1 comment:
Time to call Ghost Busters. So far this blog has taken a refreshing and amusing step away from the 'mole people' stereotype of librarians, albeit a half-step. ;) Loving it.
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